The weekend became one of peace. I drove out to my youth. I went to speak to my grandparents. Grave stones are beautiful. Processing doubts. Flowers. The whispering winds. Trails and creeks. The sounds of a small town. Silhouette’s of a child painted on stone long forgotten by weary eyes. An 83 year old woman enjoying a beer. Permanent sunshine. A song. They say “f*** the rain!” They say a lot. A back road is glorious. A town undiscovered. Beauty behind the highway. Watch that sun rise. I carried myself and it was nice. Dreaming backwards. Aching souls. Laughter and smiles. Friends forgotten & found again. A hushed goodbye. Dancing candlelight. A breeze like a caress across the cheek. Desolate abandoned lands. Time is a town that crumbles. Calander days. Man, they flew away. Sparkling wine on a Sunday morning. The hotel bar is closed. Do not disturb anymore. The hotel bar is closed. Nothing to write. A day drive will dry your eyes.
The week was a real b****. Nothing to write home about. My middle brother arrived. We decided to have drinks and make some dinner. It was lots of good laughs and long talks. He has a coworker that likes to talk to people while he is taking a poop. I’ve never heard of such a foul person. I thought I had it bad. Maybe I don’t. the weekend is finally here. I have some plans and I am happy about them. I’ll let you all know how they pan out. Cheers!!!
Jalapeño
Saturday night pizza!!!
Sunday brunch I was in the air. I had chorizo still. It needed to be used. Was it tacos or omelet. I sided with a omelet. It was the right choice.
General Tso’s chicken with fried rice.
Spanish rice topped with chicken, veggies & Queso.
Philly cheesesteak without the bread.
Fish tacos.
Steak, spicy mashed potato and asparagus.
Appetizer onion rings and then brother and I made fajitas.
My life is in a shadow. I dwell, hidden in the gloom. That’s how I feel. Perfect. I needed a mental health day Monday so I took it. Only f***ing myself because I’ll have worked piled up but I just couldn’t. It was nice and gloomy. Cool for August. I had things I could do but I just couldn’t. So I posted on a barstool in the kitchen and watched the neighborhood for a while.
Eventually is began to rain. I decided to drive around and listen to it. I ended up at the lily pond. It was beautiful and therapeutic. The pond director had recently passed away and it was a little sad. I’ve seen his face so many times over the years. You could sort of see the ponds were in a bit of neglect. Where can I volunteer.
Tuesday arrived and it was another mental health day. Sometimes you just need it. I was as unproductive as I could be. It was watermelon day. I enjoyed and brought someone some watermelon. The weather was still nice. A rare cold front in August. I wish it would stick around all month.
I’ve run myself to ground. Old dreams are breaking now. Wednesday I pulled my big boy pants on and dragged my happy a** to work. It was Janine’s birthday. She had a surprise. Toys from me & cake from Jamie. . We tried to show her she is part of the family. I guess it moved her. She hadn’t had her birthday celebrated at work. I tried to get people involved. Thanks everyone. She deserved it. Especially covering for me the last 2 days when she didn’t and shouldn’t have done so. Leroy should have filled those boots. Of course the cake was great. Jimmy. He wouldn’t shut up. 20’questions. He also told me before I made it in the office that he had not had a solid shit in 3 days. That’s lovely. Just what I want to hear. Great. Great. Wonderful. “Don’t tell anyone!” Of course I told everyone.
I woke up a little over 20 min before I needed to be at work on Thursday. I made it on time somehow. Which is funny because I’m never on time. Seemed to the the trend for the day. I wasn’t the only “stupid boy” running late. It happens. And we boys are stupid. I could lecture all day on how stupid I am. I own up to my faults and mistakes. Hey man, it makes me who I am. What a boring f***ing world it would be if everyone and everything was perfect. Am I right?
Played shuttle boy again. All in all I think that shuttle service blew away a good hour of my day. You see it’s like being caught in a web when we do these runs. She likes to talk & we are out of the office so we rarely complain. We complain to each other but that fair game. All about the pencils that she really didn’t need but in her head it was all dire straits. Needy people, let me tell you. I got to visit with Chomper though.
I went to see a somewhat “mentor” of mine only to be shown his new hair cut. Bald. Not by choice. He seems optimistic. It was a gut punch and I wasn’t expecting it. What a f***ing week. I told him having no hair in the summer is great!! It’s so much cooler. He said his head is cold in the buildings. I countered that it’s liberating not having to mess with in the mornings. He just isn’t used to it yet. Empathy.
Friday and it was burritos. I woke up confused. The morning powwow was entertaining. We bashed Hawaii for some reason. I have no reason to bash Hawaii but I rolled with it. It was good needed laughs. I left in high spirits. The rest of the day was busy and fun. I took Yvette across the campus to check out what was being auctioned. She was unsupervised. She isn’t on the east side often. We thought about snagging a drink. That’s pretty much my f***ing week. Summed up.
Jalapeño
Poached eggs over chorizo, cheese and hash browns with some spicy green sauce.
Sweet potato topped with broccoli, jalapeño & sloppy Joe.
Saturday I was up and at it early. Picked up a few burritos. After stuffing my face I mowed the side yard which apparently desperately needed mowing. Decided while I needed a shower I might as well go ahead and shave and cut my hair. Once groomed and clean it was off to wash Ruby and make her presentable for her return home. Next it was birthday shopping since I left the present at work. Next it was search for a beer that I couldn’t find in 3 location so I settled with something else. I had to go find a 3rd birthday present because one of my dogs thought the most recent purchase was theirs. Annoying to say the least. One last unexpected chore, bathe a dirty dog that just got a bath the day before.
Chores done and time before the party I decided to go see a movie for the first time since December 2019. The Green Knight. Let me tell you that I had high expectations going into this one. I knew the source material from my college days and the trailers looked promising. It was even receiving good reviews. My eyes are rolling out of my f***ing head. It was horrible. Visually stunning but the story just didn’t translate to screen as I’d hoped. Being my first theatre experience in almost 2 year I was bummed. At one point I almost fell asleep. I wanted to walk out but didn’t because of the time I had invested. I just wanted it to end. Maybe if I were high out of my mind it would work. For me and my state of mind it was a f***ing turd. Such a disappointment.
After that terrible waste of time a grabbed a real quick lite lunch and headed home to prep myself for the birthday party. You see, I don’t generally do things like this. I freak out. Once I arrive I always have fun, but getting me there is a b****. I had a beer to ease my nerves. I was excited though. This would be something new for me and it would involve friends. Let’s put it this way, it was to be the medicine that I needed.
I ended up being the first person to arrive which made it a little easier. Gave me a moment to kind of settle in. One by one everyone else arrived. The birthday girl opened her present and seemed to have a really good time. Jamie made some great Italian. Her nachos, I hate to admit, were better than mine. Who knew you could add bacon and sausage!!! Everyone had some drinks and a good time. Lots of laughs. Birthday girl was happy. I was happy that I went. Even Henry was happy!! It’s a little outside my box and something I don’t get to do. I see these people at work just about everyday so it was nice to see them outside of work. I planned on staying for just about 2 hours and it ended up being around 5 hours if that tells you anything. I always have fun once I get to where ever it is I’m going. And I had a cocktail in person! Probably should have stayed later. Yvette later called me a jacka** for leaving. I hear it was all laughs.
Once back home I made myself a drink and mellowed my mind. Reflecting on a very good day I came to terms with some s***. I’ve needed to get out more for a long time & my handicap is only in my head. I have fun and I must remember that for the future. “Be lucky he even came over” was one of the parting phrases upon my departure while being asked to stay later. I need to make a habit of “doing”. Pour me a road and I’ll go. That’s the new me I want.
Sunday I tried my hardest to sleep in. After feeding the babies at around 7:30 I crawled back into bed and managed to fall back into dreamland until almost 10:30. It was a great accomplishment. Sleep is precious to me and I’ve not been getting as much as if like.
I went to the store and only spent $28.89 on a weeks worth of meals for myself. It was a great victory. I had to call and tell people I was so proud. Back home I decided I wanted hash brows so I made brunch and watch “16 Candles“. Great flick. I figured it was going to rain so I did the floors. Don’t ask. It’s like keeping the windows of your car down when a chance for rain arrives. Went and saw my mom. Visited a friend. Overall a lazy Sunday. Looked like it was going to rain. It finally did rain! So nice and gloomy and cooler than it should have been for August 1st. Just what I needed. Sunday was pretty great. I was treated well. I wouldn’t trade it in. What a good weekend.
I used to write a lot of short fiction & poetry. I took writing courses in college. Fiction, poetry, rhetoric, etc. I really enjoyed diving deep into the darkness. It was always more of a challenge. I’ve had one published but really I just wrote for the fun of it. For myself. I figured since I have the medium I could use it to post a little something from time to time. This was primarily written in March of 2019. Last year I tweaked it up with some fourth wall breaking dialogue which I think adds to it. It’s a pretty dark little tale that I had fun with. Enjoy or not, I don’t care. My “I don’t give a shit” meter is on the red line.
A Lesson on Misery
As he dips his toes into the shallow waters it occurs to him that he had taken too much today. It was as if he had been the punchline of some cosmic beings bad joke. His endurance for anguish, both mentally and physically, were near its threshold. He couldn’t see how things could get worse, but he had already said that twice today.
As if to confirm that the world had turned its back upon him, the clouds overhead suddenly break and the cold rain begins to dampen his skin. He felt a shiver. He was not dressed for this sudden unexpected change of weather. Turning his head upwards, he shouts blasphemies towards the heavens or whomever will hear him. Throat raw from the volume of words that outpour from his being, he falls to his knees into the grime. Placing his head into his hands, the first tears begin to mix with the rain upon his cheeks.
Shuddering in the cold muck, he feels the irrelevance of his existence. What has been taken from him has left him nothing but a hollow husk. A glimpse between his fingers he takes notice of a slug moving across the mud. The slug, he reflects, has more importance than him. It has more purpose than him. It provides food for all sorts of animals. It recycles organic materials into the soil. The world benefits from the slug where it doesn’t from him. Nothing benefits from him anymore. The realization comes with some respite. However brief that it might be, a calm within the storm is a welcome gift. It won’t last long. If the earlier events of the day are any indication, an impending doom is only a matter of time.
A Voice: A lesson on misery. The pain of a soul breaking to pieces. Love torn from its very being. An emptiness of heart and mind. Broken to the core with no means of repair. Equally tormented by one’s self and the world around. Haunted by deeds done and those to come along. A void.
Struggling to regain composure, he lifts his head from his hands and momentarily the sobbing subsides. With visibility low due to the rain now coming down in sheets, he almost misses the figure standing alert across the pond. An immense dread settles over him. This unknown figure standing in the down pour. Impossible to discern through the rain, he is almost certain the lone figure is studying him. Disquiet settles into his bowels as he watches the motionless Phantom in the storm. His heart is pounding.
Uncertainty leaves him as stationary as the one across the pond seems intent on being. Irrational thoughts begin to transform themselves. If he moves the figure will begin to make its way toward him. It isn’t a large pond and he isn’t in much shape to elude should the Shadow in the rain follow.
A Voice: A thing about fear. It can either set one in motion or in deep paralysis. In his case he is almost physically unable to move.
A thunderous boom causes him to close his eyes out of instinct. When he opens them the lone figure is no longer across the pond. Scanning the surrounding area he cannot locate the figure in the rain. Both self-doubt and a gut punch of panic set it. Did he ever actually see something or was it an illusion caused by the rain and his broken mental state?
It is possible that the figure in the rain was a manifestation of all his suffering. The mind can play tricks on you. It certainly wouldn’t be the first time that his perceptions have lead him astray. Still scanning the surrounding area a moment of relief settles over him. He begins to laugh softly. Then loudly. His laugher reaching a point where it is no longer controlled. It is the sound of a man on the brink of losing his mind. A passerby would look alarmed to hear such a sound of complete oblivion exiting a person. He regains control, but the episode has left him more exhausted than he was before.
Suddenly there is a light pressure on his shoulder. His heart skips a beat. His bladder breaks and the warmth of urine spreads across his thighs. Trembling like a baby, he knows in his heart that somehow, impossible and illogical as it is, that the shadow figure is the one behind him. Its ominous presence never having gone anywhere. His mind had indeed played a trick on him. While in the grip of hysterics the Unknown managed, like a specter, to find its way behind him.
With every ounce of his being, he wills himself to turn around. What he sees shatters all threads of sanity. As he looks up into the rain and into the eyes of the Dark above him, into the eyes he has seen mirrored back at him for 40 years, all the pain is taken away. He feels nothing and suddenly, he is nothing.
***
A strange sense of déjà vu settles over him as he looks across the pound. All this pain seems familiar. He thinks to himself that he has had enough today to last a lifetime. For all his sins that went unnoticed have caught up with him. Everything has been taken from him. He is nothing now. He begins to weep.
A Voice: A lesson on misery. Often misery is a consequence of action, or lack of action. It is often something one brings upon themselves in some matter of fashion. For this man, misery could have been prevented had he choose his path thought life differently. This man lived a life in which he gained from other peoples misfortunes. He profited from the suffering of others. He now exist within a cycle. His reality is now a circle of pain. Misery on repeat until the very last star in the universe blinks out of existence. For he never learned this lesson in life. He choose to put himself ahead of others, no matter the aftermath. All the misery that he sowed upon the land is now his to experience over and over. His lesson.
The End
That was uplifting, wasn’t it? Not my best but I’m sort of proud of it because it’s new. Also, it’s short at only 1,036 words. Ambiguous. I’ve found writing without spoken dialogue to be my favorite. I dabbled with dialogue in college and I’m not sure I was ever comfortable. Hell, I’m not sure of the words coming out of my own mouth half the time so how would I feel stewing on the ones I put on paper.
Happy Friday everyone!! Cheers & hope the weekend is a blast!!!
Jalapeño
Teriyaki ground beef over a bed of jasmine rice garnished with green onions.
Meet the burrito baby!!! Egg, chorizo, brisket, hash browns, onion, jalapeño, chipotle peppers and cheese smothered in a verde sauce. Somehow I finished it off.
Burger.
Chicken Tikka Masala.
Teriyaki steak.
I had aspirations to make a meal. Low and behold….
Seared tuna over jasmine rice topped with reduced sweet soy, mango pico and side seaweed salad.
It was an invasion. We were not adequately prepared. We couldn’t match their numbers. The sheer volume of them was astounding. Where did they come from!!! They came at me like a shooting gallery from all sides. I dodged left and right. I swatted the air. They almost wrecked my golf car 4 times!!! I’m talking about the f***ing grasshopper on campus! Good lord are they awful. One flew right into my face and landed in my crotch. While I was frantically trying to get him out of there I almost high centered the cart on a damn boulder!!! My passenger even was attacked on one of our trips. She wants to burn them all and I’m down with it. I never liked the little turds. I liked them less after viewing Bugs Life. When I see a bird on campus consume one I cheer them on. Good job, friend!!! Eat them all!! May the seal of God protect us from the plague. I’m understanding why they were part of Revelations in the Bible. Apparently they are also whores.
The week really dragged on. I wasn’t kept very busy. I spent some time in the museum. I cruised the campus. I chatted with friends. Visited my momma. Cooked as usual. Had some cocktails because of life. Finally got a little much needed sleep. Talked about inappropriate things in the office. HR nightmare are we. It wasn’t a great week but it wasn’t bad as it progressed.
Friday rolled around and as I was leaving my house I notice one of my oak trees basically broke in two. I had a 20ft portion of tree too large for me to move just sitting in my yard. Great. I got my weekly burrito. Always something to look forward to. It’s like a reward for making it through the week. I basically spent the first hour of my day on campus but away from my office chatting. I was also unsupervised. Not like my boss is breathing down my neck. Besides, my coworkers know. When I finally did get to the office I hadn’t missed anything. Pretty much the daily theme, nothing happening. After an hour of this I jumped on the cart to check the mail room. During this time I offered a ride across campus. Basically delivered a person to another department. She also needed a burrito. After that I went and chatted with another friend. It was a good hour before I was back in the office. Lunch was near. The afternoon was pretty much the same, nothing happening. 2 hours in a jumped back on the cart for another mail run. Really, I just needed out to pass the time. Talk about a slow day, but it was also a really really good day. Anyway, cheers!! Have a nice weekend.
Jalapeño
For lunch Saturday I went with pizza. Two pizzas. I had to.
Dinner was sesame chicken. Spicy as all hell.
Brunch. What a mess. I was given free fries and I decided to make breakfast cheese fries. What a fantastic concept. Just place some scrambled eggs on top cheese fries. Yummy.
Spicy broccoli beef.
Bibigo steak and some snap peas.
BBQ chicken thighs w/ sweet corn.
Grilled onion and chicken thigh. Nice stir fry sauce I added. Sprinkled with habanero. Delicious.
Time, days & weeks have lost meaning in my mind. If you were to ask me what happened on a certain time I wouldn’t be able to tell you the month at this point. I’m scrambled. I suppose it happens to everyone at times. Where they spin away from the normal constraints of time. Where the mind doesn’t recognize yesterday from a week ago. It’s lack of sleep. When you don’t sleep, time isn’t real anymore. I can’t sleep. So I’ve lost all sense of time. I couldn’t likely tell you if what I did yesterday was yesterday of last week. It’s getting pretty bad. F***ing insomnia. I’ve kind of lost all give a f***’s. In a week that mushroom grew.
I solved a puzzle. The curator for the museum needed help and I obliged. What we thought needed to be done didn’t work and I couldn’t let it leave me. I had to solve it. It was one of the more satisfying things I’d done in a while. It just took some thought. I couldn’t get my mind around the first f*** up. How does cutting an inch make and object bigger. Mystery. But I figured out how to make it work. Puzzles. I like games. It was a game in my head.
I bloated myself this week. The Physics department. I followed my nose. I found lasagna and Texas toast and salad. No one was around. I decided f*** it. Of course a professor saw me toward the end. He was also following his nose. It turned out he and I ended up running into each other at the food bar the next 3 days out of coincidence. I found that funny. More or less the Physics/Geology department fed me all week.
I resumed my duty as shuttle boy. Facilities guys saw me moving all sorts of ladies here and there. I was questioned about it. It’s hot outside. If they need a ride & I’m not busy why the heck not. Save some time and keep them from getting sticky gross. Have they never thought to offer a ride? Seems a courteous thing to do. Am I just that hospitable? In all honesty, it gives me something to do and I enjoy the conversation. And I’m out of the office.
Gummi worm day
Friday. It finally rolled around. I awoke in a land of confusion. Work was rather comical. We had our traditional burritos. This has been going on for almost a year now. What should we do for the anniversary? The burrito I got was extra. I had to eat it with a freaking fork. Let’s just say lunch was not needed. Boy howdy the day drug on. Burning time at a snails pace. By the time it all ended I really could of used a drink.
Jalapeño
I made me some delicious Italian nachos.
Brunch for dinner again. This time I tried my own take on the avocado toast. I topped min with a devil egg salad and some jalapeño.
This meal was so difficult to make. Jamie gave me the recipe and I immediately thought failure. But I succeeded. Ground chicken and secrets.
Leftovers repurposed into lettuce tacos.
Chicken Alfredo over broccoli. I added some super hot jalapeño and spinach. So good but it kicked my a**. Not the most attractive meal but fantastic.
It was National Orange Chicken Day so that what I made. It’s been a while since I’ve done the stir fry.
I worked with what I had. Made a double green chili burger. Why not. I felt disgusting. It was delicious. Kill me.
Cocktail of the Week: An aged beer. almost 3 years.
Ever taken a Tuesday off? I did this last week. It might have been the best thing ever. Monday’s can be horrible. I had a horrible one. I took Tuesday off. My lord. The rest of the week was a breeze. I might start taking more Tuesday’s off. You all should do it.
I don’t have much I feel I should write about. I could but I kind of don’t feel the f***ing need to. I drove around with no breaks. Saw my nephew Teddy all week. He was my rock. Stuck in the office f***ing sucked. Took my Teacher Ed friend on the the golf cart for mail. Stuck for over and hour and had a cold burrito. Nothing to write home about. But I must post a blog on Friday so here I am. Enjoy the motherf***er!!!
Jalapeño.
BBQ grilled pork belly. Basically more bacon. With deviled egg potato salad. It was gross. It was amazing. Filthy.
Teriyaki steak and broccoli.
Fajita chicken with some green hot sauce I made. Hot as heck.
Ahi tuna lettuce tacos. I made a sriracha Mayo and sweet soy reduction. Topped with a mango pico. It was super refreshing.
Woke up around 5AM to the glorious sound of rainfall and thunder. It let OUT!!! Over and inch in a very short amount of time. I eventually settled back into before for a few hours. My dogs decided it was a good idea to chase squirrel in the rain and mud. They were drowned dirty rats. I got up to it still raining and gloomy. I could tell this would be a good day. I took a little drive and tried to float away a couple of times.
A single plan for the day, go to the campus museum. Not that I’m not there fairly often anyways, but Teddy really was excited about the rocks and the dinosaurs. The curator and I have sort of become friends so she was expecting. I think she liked having a familiar face around. I arrived before they did so we chatted for about 20 min. Nice young lady. What am I talking about, she is a baby at 31. I heard Teddy & cut the conversation short. He was blown away. It was a great time. Everyone was impressed with my fathers exhibit. Teddy had a real good time. It was certainly a good time.
Met them for lunch afterwards. The bloody marry I had was basically a meal in itself. Bloody marry bar? I’m not a big fan but my mother and brother made them look good. I honestly ordered on just for all the snacks that came along with it. Bacon. Green bean. Okra. Cheese. Sausage. Onions. Shrimp. Hell, I should have not ordered a meal after that. I only ate half of my fried green tomato BLT.
After lunch I went home for a little while and found myself in a bad fog of loneliness. I decided to go see a friend for drinks. She lifted my spirits and convinced me that happiness was a burrito from Taco Bell. I will not argue that. It was happiness
After the burrito I FaceTimed and got pissed. In turn, I got drunk. It wasn’t a good evening. But it was illuminating. I’m seeing things with fully open eye for the first time in years. The veil has been lifted. I am more aware of my surroundings. An understanding has settled upon me. I did my best and cooked some Mongolian beef. Cooking is therapy.
Woke up on the fourth in a funk over the prior nights BS. I laid on the couch stewing. Lots to stew upon. I’m glad it was overcast. The sun is oppressive. Pretty sure I woke up a little bit crazy. I was not someone anyone would want to be around. Toxicity. Lady at HEB asked if I was okay. lol
For brunch I made myself a sandwich. Avocado Mayo mix, tomatoes, bacon, egg, cheese & hash browns. Side jalapeño. It was delightful.
My brother came by while I was making some hot sauce. You would have thought he was dying. Was it that potent in here? I didn’t think so. He helped me with some shrubs I needed to trim. It required me get on a ladder with a power tool and I didn’t trust doing it on my own. It was a simple task for him. He did bring some local beer which I was thankful for.
I tried to make a trip to my mothers for burgers and the weather turned. It got dark. I felt it in my bones, rain was on the way. It f***ing let out. Had an inch in 20 min. I couldn’t clearly see across the street. I had a river in my yard. A lake. It was insane!!! I needed it. Restore some sanity!!! It’s always a mood booster. Glad I didn’t clean the floors.
Once it gave up I went to my mother to be with the family. My other parents showed up. I talked to my other dad for hours. Made my f***ing evening. These two raised me part time. Great talking. My brother made some hot dogs and burgers. I don’t know how anyone could eat hot dogs after watching thing competition this afternoon. America!!!
Broken rainbow.
Hope everyone had a happy 4th of July. Mine ended up being a lot of fun. I stayed long enough for fire works and made it out quickly enough to avoid traffic. Good times with the kids. Love them. Real morale boasters. Cheers, folks.
It’s Friday and I don’t have a dang thing written. That’s okay. Sometimes it’s fine to not talk. The week went by rather fast. We had a good amount of rain finally. It made me happy. The rain. Wednesday my brother and his family came to town. It was a good time seeing the kids. The weekend should be fun. Might make a weekend blog? Maybe. Depends on my energy level. Kids, you know. Campus life was entertaining. It’s nice to have friends. Leroy was a work of art. Lord have mercy. I really wasn’t too busy so I made the most of my time and just did whatever I wanted. One note of concern, I have something wrong with my right thumb. It burns, itches and the skin is peeling. Stress? Can that be the culprit? The f***k if I know. I could use some sleep.
I sure played taxi service a lot this week. People needing rides across campus. Yvette on her mail run. Jamie (needy b****) to the museum. Pregnant woman to her office. I was running people all over the campus. I don’t mind because it worked as a distraction and got me out doing things. These people don’t get to cruise in a golf car everyday.
HAPPY F***ING FRIDAY!!!! We got a half day!!! With rain in the foreseeable forecast, I’m optimistic. I went to lunch with family. They were impressed. Had drinks with some campus friends at the bar. Shared laughs and stories. Was not planned, it just happened. Look at me being spontaneous. The rest of the day I spent running errands and playing with the kids. Building a rocket ship. I wanted rain. It teased. I got some sprinkles. Rude.
Song of the Week: Uncertain Smile by The The
Jalapeño
I went to lunch with my mother Saturday. It’s probably been since 2019 that I’ve had lunch here. Crazy.
For dinner I made a green sauce and some carne asada. Both turned out to be delicious.
I skipped brunch because of a road trip with mom so I just made it for dinner. A breakfast bowl with chorizo potato’s and eggs.
Lettuce tacos. Again.
No menu this week and just winging it. Chicken thigh with Cajun seasoning I acquired from a friend with peppers and onion. Over a bed of beans. It was delicious. It was a little like meal I made in college in Lubbock. just a step up with the seasoning.
Brother, sister-in-law, nephews came to town. We wanted Chinese. The place we wanted closed early. I convinced them to try a place I love, Ban Moon. It was a hit.
Cajun? Maybe. I’ve got a taste. So I used the same from earlier in the week. This time the chicken was over red beans and rice. I wanted more of a meal I’d already had. Haha
Lunch with the family. They were impressed. I was still full from the Friday burrito so I could only eat one. Snack for later.
Every day of the week I was a day ahead in my head. We all know the feeling, but has it happened to you everyday of the week? I found myself constantly trying to do things as if I were a day ahead in the week. I almost took out the trash a day in advance. I almost went to get Friday burritos on Thursday. Let me tell you something, it sure made the week seem THAT much longer. Waking up each morning thinking I was advanced and the sad realization later that I was actually a day behind. To feel defeated so many times. It was crushing my “want to”.
For whatever reason, I was not the only one on campus suffering from the phenomenon. At least two other I know on campus were on the same boat. Why don’t I ever wake up on a Friday thinking it’s Thursday? That would be a great sensation to know I was actually ahead of my minds dilemma.
It was a pretty s*** week in all honesty. I didn’t care for a lot that happened. Work was extreme and life was s***. I was happy Bekah was able to finally get away from her job. Soul sucking s***hole that it was. Bittersweet because she had some good friends and had put in some good time. Leaving ain’t easy. She had a last day and a first day all in the same week. Proud of her. I hope a new scene treats her well. I’m supportive for all her adventures. She seems to like it so far. Two days in.
Fridays are not supposed to be busy but this one was. I needed sleep and I had “no want to”. Drained in all ways possible. Vacant eyes. Vacant as the sea. Need to toss some coins into the sewer at the bottom of the wishing well. But as the day progresses and I reached it’s conclusion, a zen like clam overlapped me. I felt at peace. Maybe it was just exhaustion but it was nice. I picked up some nachos that ended up being a snack and saved for and even later snack, popped a beer and just chilled. Decided to grill some spicy Asian whatever the f***k. Shockingly a lot of actually good movies were to be found on TV. I jammed out some. The puppies got some of that ahi tuna that was planned for last night. They seemed happy as can be. Nothing exciting. Just a mellow mind. Happy Friday to all and a great weekend on top of it!!! Cheers!!!
Tuna vibes.
Father’s Day. It’s weird once you no longer have a father or are a father yourself. You’ve been celebrating this day most of your life, getting together with family. Usually full spread BBQ. Maybe shuck some oysters. It was most often a cooking event with our family. Suddenly you just don’t do a damn thing. I suppose the family could have continued but that didn’t happen. So this day that you are prone to celebrating just becomes another f***ing day. I woke up and mowed the lawn. Dad would have been proud. Made brunch for Bekah and sister-in-law. I sure did cook out. I had drinks. I listened to some of his favorite Neil Young. I suppose I celebrated him in my own way. Unfortunately it’s just not the same without him and the rest of the family. I guess this is what happens. A sense of sadness when the days roll by. Ah, life.
Jalapeño
Hash brown eggs Benedict. Hash browns with melted sharp cheddar, avocado spread, shaved ham and an over easy egg. Everyone liked this one.
Chicken fajita lettuce tacos. Delicious.
Once again, burger lettuce tacos. You have noticed all the lettuce tacos. It’s a thing.
Crab cakes and salad.
Zachos
Ham and swiss lunchable. It was going to be ahi tuna lettuce tacos but sometimes life likes to throw a wrench at you and you do what you have to do.
Some grilled Asian chicken with jalapeño and grilled zucchini because you know I have a lot of zucchini. Chicken was f***ing perfect.
En Fuego 