So it’s a new year. I guess that’s a good enough time to reboot my blog, which has been dormant for months. 2023 has already started out as an improvement to the last. Especially the ending. I was hospitalized, forced to stay home for a month and finally told that I can’t drive for at least 3 months. I still can’t drive.(Although not driving has warranted me certain time with a special person). I had a Intracranial Hemorrhage (brain bleed) from falling down because my blood sugar was out of control. Due to this I started having seizures which led to more falling down.(I also did bite a dime size chunk off my tongue which wasn’t cool). I was a stubborn goat and refused to go to the hospital until it was almost too late. I almost died. So 4 days in the ICU. The first day I was on a ventilator. Somehow I managed to remove it with my tongue. The nurse said she had never seen that happen. Bless the nurses and some nursing students. They witnessed a lot of me. My doctor said “He fell down a LOT. What a joy. I was frequent to ripping out my IV’s. They had to restrain me and place some IV’s in my feet. I got to become a pet to some of the nurses. Some found me fun because I was able to communicate. One was partial to taking me on walks. Damn walker. I hated that thing but I couldn’t walk without it. I recovered much faster than they originally though. There was talk of me being shipped out of town but I was able to walk myself out of the hospital. Talks of physical therapy. It’s not over. I still have some memory issues. Particularly with names. I’m still going to have at least one more CAT scan. I do not miss that hospital food. Now I’m on a pump and seriously watching what I eat.

I found someone over the course of time since I have been out of the hospital. I am a lucky guy. To be fair, I had gone out on multiple dates with her before we actually started seeing each other but I was just too damn slow (edit: cowardly) to make a move. I’ve liked her for a while. I knew she cared when she came to see me in the hospital with my mother. I came out of a fog to her sitting next to my mother. I made a face and thought “oh shit” and passed back out. I was first in mild shock because I didn’t want her to see me like I was. I wonder how much she saw.( Unfortunatly many saw a lot of me). She came back to visit me two more times. After having a near death experience you start to realize that you should take hold of your life. If you have feelings for someone, let them know. You might not get another chance. So I kissed her one night after dinner. I should have kissed her months before. Now I have a girlfriend. I’m happy. I always found her attractive but I was married and never even thought a thing. Why would I? I can now. It’s weird how life works out. Maybe this will be “the one”? Who fucking knows. Follow the heart where it takes you. She makes me feel alive while before I was feeling empty.

Btw, I’m not editing the cuss words. Fuck. Damn. Shit. Bastard. Bitch. Etc.

So I am back at work after the long month stuck mostly at home. Because I can’t drive or lift anything over 30lbs I am basically forced to be THE office guy, which you all know I FUCKING HATE. I miss getting out on the campus and seeing friends. I miss getting out on the town doing business with people for the campus. My coworkers have taken me out to see some people and it was great. They have been so good to me. Hopefully I will be cleared soon. Fingers crossed. I’m sure it gets a little old for the people that are shuttling me around and running certain errand for me. Bless them all for what they have done.

Only a couple weeks back at work and the Christmas vacation begins. It was a shorter one than I’m used to but that was okay with me considering I’d been off the entire month of November recovering. The break began with a trip to Houston to be with all the family. It’s a long trip & I hate Houston but what else would I do? Skip Christmas and be all alone. I was also sad that I would be away from my girlfriend but I turns out I would see plenty of her when I got back in town. Besides, it was only 4 days. I finally was able to meet the youngest nephew. He was a real joy. The trip was rather fun all around. My sleeping arrangement was a little lame, the bottom bunk bed. Oh well, the kids had fun burying me in stuffed animals every morning. Had some good meals and good drinks. Saw some people I have missed seeing. It was a nice change. The ride back was not. After Houston I still had the oldest two nephews to entertain. They wore my mother and I out. So much energy. After some time with them I would see my lady. It was nice spending full days with her. I even was invited to her family New Years Eve party. They can cook for me any day. The break ended and work was slow waiting for the student to come back and the semester to begin.

I have gotten to walking again due to the lack of vehicle mobility. Good for my legs. I feel so much better than I did before my hospital stay. It’s nice. I was eating on campus since I can’t really make it home and back in the hour. Lucky for me the weather has been agreeable.

One other thing I should mention is how much fun it is to cook for someone again. Someone that had never had my meals. Someone that each meal is a first time experience. She really seems to enjoy them. So the meals are fun again.

I’m posting a load of food pictures since it’s been so long. No descriptionsb.

Jalapeno!!!!!!!!

I think of the old days and my Bekah is always on my mind. 14 years. It’s been a year since she left. Movement’s like waves. She doesn’t live here anymore. Time is an ocean. Love her. Life. Oh well. Lots has changed. Some better and some worse.

Is living death in slow motion. Yes it is. People age in a way like a good wine or they go skunk like a bad beer. I’m writing that down and those are my words and they are fucking true. 😂. Getting old feels like loosing control and I don’t like it.

We are pretty much always alone, correct. The love I’ve had wasn’t ever taken for granted. Really though, we are on our own. Companionship might not be so much part of the human nature other than breeding. We lack a form. We are beast of confusion. Can’t live alone yet not with someone. Walking alone is hard. It’s also hard with someone.

There is someone on the campus I like. I am afraid. I guess you do what you do. Moving on. A heart beating, it fully keeps going. I’m willing to go through that door. Open.

Surrounded by the night. Sleep eludes me. Punch me in the face. I need a magic cape.

After such poetic prose let me get natural.

Happy Birthday Hazel!!!

Friday the week finally found it’s end. Because our campus Admissions program botched a tour for Yvette’s daughter, I was able to get in contact with my connections in the nursing department for a private tour. At 3 o’clock we met at HHS. The tour was spectacular. It was almost like it was staged. 40 min later a young lady was excited. I couldn’t have been happier to have helped. I was pretty much sold on the nursing program. It was very detailed. I made an impact on a child’s future decision. Just the light on her face made me smile.

That was it for the week. I went and got drinks and dinner with Mystery Girl # 5 and went home to rest. Cheers!!!

Jalapeño

Saturday I was surprised with a burrito from Jamie and than because of conversation I Lao wanted Menudo. Great morning for food.

Chili Mack and cheese with the green beans.

Raw tun, seaweed salad and no rice poke.

Street tacos from the campus UC

First air fry attempt. Chicken leg quarters.

Yelp. In my 13 years (that I know) as a diabetic I had my first big FUCK. I passed out, busted my head and lost around 30 min.

I was waiting in line at Chick fil A wanting “yogurt”. feeling fine and focused. As I was leaving I started feeling really dizzy and light headed. I was by the vending machines so I would get a sprite. NONE of the f***er’s would take my f***king card. I panicked and tried to eat my yogurt but my hands were to Shakey and I dropped it. The rest I do not remember. I apparently fell on my head. Not sure how long I was there. The next thing I know is I’m in a chair being asked if I was okay. I said yes. He said “ you have yogurt all over yourself and you are missing a lens from your glasses. The campus cops were called. 4 people were involved. One of them knew I was diabetic so they got me sugar. It eventually leveled me out. They really pushed an ambulance but no. It amazing how many people heard the next day. It’s a bit embarrassing having something like that happen in public and the alternative would be being alone.

I don’t know what happened. My new device did not alert me. (Turns out I sort of screwed the pooch calibrating it so it was reading substantially off) I had a lump on my head, a hurt jaw and some broken pride. How many people saw me and what the hell was I doing. It was terrifying.

Saturday my date and I finally were able to eat at this new place called Urban Salt. We had been trying to go since March and the stars finally aligned. I had so much fun out with her. I mean, I laughed until my face hurt. I don’t know why we waited 2 months between our last date. Even if it goes no where serious, Mystery Girl # 4 and I have a lot of fun together. That’s what matters, right? She wouldn’t keep coming out with me if she wasn’t also having a good time. She is a busy woman but I’ll try and get her out with me sooner the next time.

I’m finally a cyborg. I have a machine attached to my belly. It’s so cool being able to see where my levels are at in real time. It’s already helpful. Thanks to Yvette for really pushing me. I don’t know why I hesitated so long.

Happy birthday to my friend The Slovak!! 37. I took a half day to celebrate with her. We didn’t get to do it last year due to circumstances but usually it’s a yearly tradition. Some people love birthdays. We went and had appetizers at one place and had lunch at another. Some drinks, of course. I told staff it was her bday and they did their thing.

Jalapeño.

Pork ribs.

Buffalo wings. They were not good. Should have grilled.

Seared tuna and seaweed. Yum!

Meatloaf meatballs and stuffed mushrooms.

It was my office week and it was terrible. I could not sleep for the life of me. Tuesday I came in with 3 hours of sleep. How do you think I functioned. Everything was super bright and my head was in a fog. I barely made it. I was the model example of exhaustion. I’m tired all the time. It also appears all my coworkers are suffering from sleep disorders. My boss is doing a sleep study as we speak. Yvette suggest I do the same. My latest problem isn’t going to sleep but waking up around 2am and not going back to sleep.

After many failed attempts at trying to get a Dexcon glucose monitoring device my good friend Yvette badgered me into taking the action upon myself. She was a convincing inspiration. The mother bear in her came out. Boy can her honesty be brutal. I spent about 2 hours of my life on the phone getting bounced around by insurance, doctors nurses & pharmacy. After time spent digging it was revealed to be an error on my doctors office. A code was changed from pharmacy benefit to medical benefit. I still don’t have the device because I need my doctors nurse to call me back. No was was I paying close to a grand out of pocket. At this time in my life I really need the device. I have way to many swings and my A1C is a disgrace. Mud.

Friday came unceremoniously. Slow day. The weekend was here. Hope everyone has a great time.

Jalapeño

Crab cake eggs Benedict.

Spaghetti squash and meatballs

Tikka masala.

Burger Patty.

Chicken okra pepper stir-fry.

Wonton ginger soy chicken tacos.

Why are short weeks so damn LONG!! I swear it last a life time. I was busy so it should have moved. The belly up gator pictured below pretty much summed up my week.

I have all my fall decor up. It’s made my mood all the better. Fall is my favorite.

Never had much time to write any so I’m leaning it at this.

Jalapeño

Chicken fired steak Topped with shrimp. Amazing

Jalapeño stuffed Bell Pepper.

Brisket.

Chipotle beef and squash.

Chicken cordon blu.

Seared tuna and seaweed.

Spicy ginger soy salad.

Some people are hard to put together. Figuring them out… motives.

F***ing pumpkin spice. Bulls***!

Our tiny little town finally received its much needed rain. A collective sigh of relief. Not only the rain, it was nice and cool. You have to understand it had been month since good rain and the temps had been over 100 degrees. Everyone was in a better mood.

Friday. It was a really busy nice week. I didn’t have much time to work on this blog. Someone got a nice purse. I got drenched and killed a golf car. Almost ran down by a crazy driver. Friday I took a walk in the rain. Wonderful funny day.

Jalapeño.

Sesame chicken.

BBQ pulled chicken, fried okra and corn.

Chorizo omelet.

Chorizo bunless burger.

Chorizo egg tacos.

Chili for the first time of the year. If was a cool cloudy day.

The first day of the fall semester. WTF happened to the summer. Where did it go. I had some really high and low moments. I have one friend that really made a positive impact on the months. I hope she realizes my appreciation. It was a f***ing weird summer for me. I was maybe “manic depressive”. I had ups and downs. I was happy to be divorced but at the same time it was a gut punch. Some days I felt a little crippled. I took a lot of time off. In the previous blog, I ate like I didn’t have type 1 diabetes. I’m glad the kids are back. Thank god for friends. Even when they are f***ing turds. I have fun with her and fun is all that matters right now. Drum roll.

It’s really hard to believe Summer has passed and the fall semester in a go. It so weird getting used to the extra traffic on campus. It takes a bit, but it’s fun. The future all over the place. Hope they learn what they need in life. We did get some appreciation from Admissions.

We didn’t get the rain that was promised. Sad fact.

Friday finally arrived. It was National dog da and toilet paper day. Reason to celebrate. What a week.

Jalapeño

Teriyaki chicken with snap peas.

Burger salad.

Ground beef avocado burritos with chili verde sauce.

I wanted wings so I got wings.

Spicy chicken Caesar salad.

Saturday was one of the best I’d had in a while. I was nervous for some reasons. I had a happy hour date (a date!!) with a friend. It wasn’t the first time. It was the 4th. I suppose this time might have been more me pestering and she agreed finally. Again!! I had pissed her off. When she said yes I was taken aback. I was nervous. Butterflies.

We laughed our t a**es off. Seems to always be the case. It’s great to have fun with someone. It really made my weekend and I needed it. I don’t know what I’m doing. It’s been so long. She is fun. How many people can you say that about? Can you say that about many?

Sunday was the unusual mother son lunch date. Always a fun time. The divorce really brought my mother and me closer. I’d go a week or longer without seeing her where now it’s almost everyday.

The week was busy busy. That’s all I have to say about the week.

Jalapeño.

Bow tie pasta salad w/ corn, peas, carrots, tomato, jalapeño, ranch, salsa, cheese, spinach & grilled chicken. Heaven on a hot summer day.

Sushi platter. I did not make this.

Rigatoni with a meat marinara sauce.

Hawaiian bud sliders with some jalapeño slaw.

Italian nachos.

Orange chicken stir fry. Hotter than hell.

So I’ve been eating well I guess. I don’t have much to say about the past 2 weeks. I took some time. I had some mental stress. You all know how it is. I can’t say that I didn’t have a good time through it. I have to pull my head out my a**. Can’t let bulls*** bother me. My mind is an ocean and my memories are waves. So this is basically food I ate and some picture I took on the side.

It you can’t be heard you can’t be seen.

Btw, Friday was great. Had fun and busted my a**. Busy and happy. Someone brought me some tea when I needed it. Joy. Happy Friday!