Saturday I slept in until about ten o’clock. That is very rare for me, and I was surprised everyone didn’t wake me. I must have needed it. I don’t usually sleep that late, and I woke up a little groggy.

Since the rest of the family had already eaten breakfast, I decided to skip that meal and make some burgers for everyone. I put together a grocery list and headed to the store—where absolute chaos awaited. It was a shit show. They had some holiday bullshit going on. Isn’t it a little early to have people dressed as Santa and elves? Apparently not for this store.

I survived the madness and got started on the burgers.  Prep work is generally my least favorite part of cooking, but I don’t mind it because it gives me something to do. Burgers don’t take much prep, so I was happy to make a lot of them. Easy meals are the best meals. Everyone seemed pretty happy with the food.

I headed out to my mother’s to water her plants and ended up staying a lot longer than planned. I got sucked into a Netflix special about Eddie Murphy and couldn’t pull my eyes away. I grew up watching his movies—probably way too young—so getting more insight into the man was a welcome comfort. It was great entertainment.

I was genuinely shocked to find out Eddie Murphy never drank or did any drugs, considering he spent the ’80s surrounded by people who were chemically enhanced. The stories he was involved in are epic.

That night Yvette and I had a date night. I wanted to take her somewhere fun. It was a beautiful November evening—unseasonably warm—so we went to the Lake House Pizzeria. Sitting outside by the lake wearing nothing but shorts and short-sleeve shirts is not something you’d expect this time of year, but there we were. Even better, the one freeze we had murdered all the annoying insects. Romantic vibes.

Sunday I made way too much breakfast: fifteen poppers and chorizo eggs. Sadly, only Yvette and I ate. Tee ran off to the gun range, and Lola can’t eat cream cheese. Tragic bummer. On the bright side, we had leftovers for the week. 

The girls went to Yvette’s parents’ for lunch, and I tackled the yard. Acorns. Everywhere. I had so many of the little bastards in my driveway that I felt like I was preparing for battle. The fuckers. I filled half a trash can with them. Big oak trees are a pain in my ass, but I love them anyway for their benefits.

I trimmed some more limbs too. We had a stop sign that was partially obscured by an oak limb. I didn’t want someone getting into a wreck and claiming they didn’t see the sign. I know the city is supposed to take care of these things, but they hadn’t done a damn thing, so I stepped up. That was even more work for me—breaking down and disposing of the branches. Love being a homeowner some days.

Next up: cleaning my car. It needed it. Desperately. After a few smart-ass comments from people over the last few weeks, I finally gave in and cleaned both the inside and outside. It’s amazing what you can accomplish with a little shame-based motivation.

Monday was just chaos.

The highlight might have been the Staff Senate meeting. They wanted to enforce attendance more tightly. I’m against it because my job isn’t as flexible as some. Things come up last minute, and I must actually do my work—unlike certain people who seem to have mastered the art of not working at all.  I think putting a tighter grip on attendance will discourage more people from wanting to be on the Staff Senate. We already have piss-poor attendance as it is.

They proposed an amendment to the bylaws—three unexcused absences and six excused— and suddenly the room erupted. There was a lot of disagreement. Some people thought that was too many absences. Others thought it was just right. Some others and I thought it was way too murky and not clearly defined.  What if you were on medical leave?  Maternity leave?  Does that count against you?   They were so eager to enforce attendance that they really didn’t think things through.  New bylaws were just quickly laid to paper. 

So in the end we couldn’t even vote because revisions were needed. The people who introduced the vote looked extremely disappointed.  Crushed.  I enjoyed every moment of it. I’d already had issues with this topic, and they were too cowardly to give me a proper response. 

Honestly, I should just resign as senator and become an alternate. These people are sucking all the fun out of it, and fun was literally the only reason I agreed.

I spent a good hour and a half Wednesday morning trying to get my internet bill down. Lucky for me, I had nothing pressing to do at work, so I could afford the time while on the clock. I was bounced around between three different individuals. It was a sad state of affairs.

At first, all I wanted to do was renegotiate. I had the prices of local competitors and what they were offering new customers—basically the same service I was already getting. I could cancel and switch to one of them for about forty dollars less, so why the hell wouldn’t I leave my current provider? I called my provider and was introduced to my first taste of the hold music.

The first lady I spoke with offered me a ten-dollar discount if I linked my bank account to their system. NO!!! I learned my lesson the hard way linking a bank account for automatic withdrawal with my medical bills. Hard no. When I told her that wasn’t going to work and that she’d need to match the competitors, she transferred me to someone above her. Yay—more elevator music. I think this is a tool they use to test a person’s willpower. I wanted to give in, but I remained strong.

The second lady offered me the same thing, plus a discount for going paperless and a “great deal” on cellular service if I switched to them. Again—no. I didn’t want deals; I wanted my bill to match the local competitors. After another threat to cancel, I was back on hold listening to the most beautiful, barf-inducing elevator music ever created.

The final girl must have been upper tier, because right off the bat she offered me a matching price if I would remain a customer. Ridiculous that it took over an hour to get to this stage, but I understand their logic. Most people give up. Most people take the small offers because it’s better than nothing.

I endured. Unfathomable patience from a man who has none. In the end, I got what I wanted.

On that Wednesday evening, we had one hell of a thunderstorm roll through town. It felt as if I’d turned the calendar back to May and a storm of early summer was announcing itself. It was wild. The light show was spectacular—fucking crazy for November. There were even reports of hail. Everyone in the house was up and moving around because of the unexpected fury of the beast outside, while I was out there like a loon, smiling ear to ear. I was full of static and decided to have a drink to fully embrace the wild weather wonders around us. I was loving every moment of it.

Thursday, it was more of the same. We desperately needed the rain. So nice and gloomy. I was in my element, with an elevated sense of happiness about me. Even a minor hit from my insurance company couldn’t bring me down.

It seems that when I had my ex-wife removed from my auto insurance, for some reason or another, they failed to cancel her “Death, Dismemberment, and Loss of Sight” coverage. How the hell that happens, I have no idea. I blindly assumed that all of that was included, and once she was removed, everything pertaining to her would also be removed. Tricky bastards, those insurance companies.

I was likely not in the best of places when I removed her. Heck, I’ll be honest—I wasn’t in the best of places at all. I was trying to get her name removed from so many things at that time that it doesn’t surprise me something slipped by unnoticed. I was a mess. If I wasn’t working, I was probably drinking. Dark days. At least they somehow caught it, and I’ll be receiving a credit for the time they’ve been charging me. What’s done is done. It’s not like I even knew I was getting screwed, so why be upset about it? Now I see it as a benefit.

Friday finally arrived, and thank God I had work carried over from Thursday, because I wouldn’t have had a damn thing to do that morning. Zilch. Nada. It was miserably slow after ten o’clock.

That afternoon was a different beast—busy as fuck. For better or worse, I was underwater, reaching for the surface. It was crazy. I was having a blood-sugar battle on top of it all: high, low, and back again. Rinse, repeat. Hard times.

After work, things finally mellowed out. Teegan headed out of town to watch his last high school football game. Yvette and Lola grabbed Whataburger and settled in with a Christmas movie while I ordered carryout from The Penny. It was a nice way to close out the week.

Happy Friday!!!

Jalapeño.

Carne guisada bowl

Tacos al pastor.

Shoyu hot dogs. A Hawaiian comfort food, I hear.

Chicken chow mien. those time everyone got in on eating it. Chicken breast, egg noodles, celery, broccoli, cabbage, carrots, green onion and a hoisin sauce mixture.